5.20.2009

Carol LoPresto is fa-hab-ulous

From New York Magazine.
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I love this photo of Carol LoPresto so much. I see myself headed in this direction of bohemian wackiness and love it. If I could just find a hat to fit over my amazingly large head, I would do the scarf/hat combo with aplomb.

Makes me happy to live in a world where outfits like this exist...and happy to be going to New York in a few weeks where people like this (me!!) thrive.

5.16.2009

Could it be? Yes it is! EUROVISION!!!

Eurovision comes and goes so quickly - I didn't even know the semi finals were this week until I saw the Dutch entry on the front page of the newspaper. Thank goodness there was time to review the semi-final performances and get them on the blog before the finals tonight. I must go now plan my Eastern European diva ensemble to wear to the viewing party (otherwise known as Joshua's birthday party - lucky duck). Thank goodness I have a crazy ruffled shirt in the costume trunk! Now Tom and I just have to fight for who is going to wear it...

Reviews written while viewing on YouTube - so there is no particular order.

Montenegro - Just Get Out of My Life
The chorus is "Just get out of my, out of my, out of my head." Irony this early in the show is a bad sign. Male dancer wearing white cotton pants is completely distracting as he does some sort of aerobics behind the singer. I start my synthetic hair extensions (aka: SHE) count now: 1.

Turkey - Dum TekTek
Harem pants with slits up the front on the backup dancers. All women on stage wearing red and one token male backup singer wearing a brown satin shirt, which doesn't really match. OOOOH new male dancer just back-flipped onto the stage! Apparently he is the one from the chorus who "kisses like it's his profession"' though the giant skirt he's wearing leads me to think not really.

Iceland - Is it True
Pixie-nosed elf wearing one of Belle's dresses from "Beauty and the Beast." Seriously, she and the backup singers look like bridesmaids from a 1984 wedding where the bride has confidence issues. Why is there a dolphin projected on the screens in the background? EARNEST BALLAD GUITAR PLAYING! Awesome. The song is quite lovely in an adult contemporary sort of way.

Romania - The Balkan Girls
Lots and lots of dancers, a fog machine and SHE all over the place. She just sang "My peeps are ready to go," which should signal the definitive death knoll for that particular piece of slang.

Israel - There Must Be Another Way
I don't understand the verses, but their harmonies are just lovely. Strange gothic lesbian overtones, or that might just be the influence of a late night episode of "The L Word" Oh. Oh. Oh. And now the singers are drumming. For five seconds. Strange.

Greece - This is Our Night
A guy is actually singing. And dancing. And his shirt is short, so when he moves at all, it rides up on his stomach. It's like he is wearing a flesh belt.

I have yet to see a sequin. I am very disappointed.

Finland - Lose Control
The name of this group is "Waldo's People." They have fire dancers, a rapper/singer who is dressed like Eminem and three blond backup singers who are wearing outfits that don't really match and sound like a bad girl group. All over the place and confusing. They will probably win.

Serbia - Happiness
1. Accordion player in black leather
2. Ironic bald dancers in curly toed shoes and wallet chains
3. Singer with bleached afro
4. Diva singer in giant white tutu
5. Fabulous backdrops of band members as pixelated avatars
Eurovision has officially begun.

Norway - Fairytale
Finally, a violin. And it is the singer who is playing! And he is all all cute and sounds like Cliff Richard. Totally a favorite to win. Sort of folk and timeless and sweet. But his smile is so big it scares me.

Croatia - Lijepa Tena
zzzzzzzzzzz. Soon to be playing as the backing track to a "Come to Croatia and Get Some Sleep" commercial. I hear they do have lovely beaches.

Slovenia - Love Symphony
Men in grey suits rocking stringed instruments coming out of what look like phone booths or those sleeping pods in "Alien." Singer is still inside her booth. Is she trapped? Her mic is working but all l I see is a silhouette in a flowing gown. Perhaps she is ugly? There she is!! She has a big voice - and a pierced tongue. I didn't need to know that.

Hungary - Dance With Me
There was stripping down from quite cool mod outfits to some sort of ..ew ew ew! They are icky. I have to stop watching.

Albania - Carry Me In Your Dreams
There is a man wearing a sequin turquoise full body suit that covers his face dancing behind the singer whose tutu is almost showing her tuck tuck. And evil mimes in black trench coats. Her SHEs are so plastic they may melt under the lights.

Azerbaijan - Always
Synthetic hair extensions are to former Soviet singers what blue eyeshadow was to their Soviet gymnast counterparts. At least be on tune. I know all your Soviet satellite sisters will vote for you and probably make you advance to the finals, but really. Step up your game because you are embarrassing yourselves with your flatness.

Denmark - Believe Again
They actually have a band and not just backup dancers! And they sing. Love the ubiquitous long-haired rhythm guitarist and bass player wearing the black leather cowboy hat that Chris Robinson left behind at the Copenhagen stop of the 1992 Black Crows tour. Just when I was thinking Eurovision had become "Solid Gold", my faith is renewed.

Sweden - La Voix
It is unfortunate that ABBA was the most successful Eurovision winner because it sort of ruined Sweden forever. How can you top "Dancing Queen?" So this year they went with a standard beautiful blond giant opera singer auditioning for an Andrew Lloyd Webber musical. She is a soprano - no doubt about that as the glasses are shattering around me.

Andorra - Get A Life
The tiny country between France and Spain features a girl group singing in Catalan and English. I think those guitars they are playing are just for show, which confirms my idea that they have the WORST STYLIST EVER. Who put the lead singer in giant angel wing sleeves?

Portugal - Todas As Ruas Do Amor
This is actually lovely. I like them so much I want to believe her hair is real and not plastic. Accordions are always good, as well men doing the liquid hip dance behind bongos. All sung in Portuguese with a minimum amount of cheese - clearly this is the moment when camp took a bathroom break.

Bosnia and Herzegovina - Bistra Voda
Hmmm. They are dressed for an 18th century battle where everyone had to wear shades of winter white. So overly dramatic without any sense of humor at all. And look! They are posing on the stage in a dramatic tableau complete with red flag flying behind them! Don't worry young tigers, I'm sure the butcher still has meat!

Malta - What if We
Clearly Malta's Celine Dion with sassy "oh no you din it" neck shakes at the bridge. And she has lots of neck, so that was a big move.

Ukraine - Be My Valentine (Anti-Crisis Girl)
This is why you keep tuning in. Men in chrome gladiator outfits. Singer taking a break to do a drum solo. So pointless.

The Netherlands - Shine
Performed by Dutch favorites "The Toppers." Imagine three men vaguely in their 50s, covered with fake tan and wearing ill-fitting grey sequin tuxedos singing a series of cliches that make no sense when put together in a chorus or verse. And they put a giant woman in a white dress covered with fringe and then made her wear the portable turn table even though there WAS NO SCRATCHING. Why did they do this to her? Why?

SPOILER ALERT: It was front page news that The Toppers didn't make the finals...